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She was safe, but I was scared.

Updated: Feb 13, 2019

When my oldest daughter was two, she used to get out of her room at night with her blanket and fall asleep under our dining table.

I went into our daughter’s room and she was not in her bed. I started calling for her, but I heard only silence. I checked all the doors and went to the basement. Still nothing.

I started listening to see if I could hear giggles thinking maybe she was hiding from me as a joke. Still nothing.



I started to lose it. I was running and yelling at the top of my lungs. I was searching behind and under everything.

I finally found her under our dining room table.


She was asleep with her blanket unbothered by my yelling. She was safe, but I was more scared than ever.


All I could think of was a fire. If I was confused with smoke everywhere and she left her room, I would not be able to find her. My husband was traveling Sunday night to Thursday night. It was up to me to save our two most important gifts.


I was beyond scared.


I was sleep deprived and scared.


My husband heard my fear and we created a solution…many did not agree with our tactics. From then on, we turned all the children’s door knobs around.

Now we could lock our children in their room overnight. I knew if there was a fire, I would spend my last breath getting to my babies as any good parent would do.


A surprise occurred over the next four years.


Our children learned to self-sooth back to sleep.

They became readers, and they played well by themselves during their nap-time. My three children were fifteen months apart in age so I needed everyone to go down for a two hour quiet time. Some slept the whole time, and others never slept. These two hours were my sane hours.


We learned as parents that we could set a routine for our children. Our children thrived on this predictable routine. We gained confidence as parents that we could do something unconventional and receive amazing results.

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